"Lestat" 1998 Chapter 13

And then I found Jennifer

During the time that Lena, Amber and I were digging up as much as we could about Lestat, I received a cryptic e-mail from someone. It simply said:

From: Jennifer
To: Me

You have the wrong address.

Strangely, I did not know this person and never wrote her an e-mail. Remember when I said I thought Lestat had been hacking into my e-mail? I instantly thought, “hmmm..this could be one of Lestat’s women, and he is doing to her what he did to me. He has probably used my e-mail to send her a message, otherwise, how would she have my e-mail address to respond to?”

There was no record of a message to her in my “sent” folder, but those are easily deleted.

I wrote her back and simply said:

“Do you know Lestat?”

I didn’t say much more, because I couldn’t be sure yet who she was. But she took the bait and wrote me back, saying she did know him. My intuition was right! I quickly responded telling her who I was, that I had been engaged to him for the past year, and if she were involved with him, she should know about his behavior.

However, she responded as I did, when I received the first phone call and the first e-mails. I didn’t believe it and I was suspicious and angry at a stranger trying to “ruin” my “perfect” relationship.

Date: 7/16/99
From: Jennifer
To: Me

Did you give someone my name so that they could send me email about Lestat? I'm guessing so since you're the only other person to offer up personal information. What's the deal, why go through so much trouble? If you have something to say, say it, and I'll do with it what I want. Words from strangers on my email screen carry little weight. I can really only trust what I see, be it from strangers and friends. If you didn't forward my name, I apologize, but I can't think of anyone else who would care to do so.

This e-mail was quite interesting – she was defensive (as I was) and revealed she was receiving other mail from other people about Lestat (as had also happened to me). Clearly other people were trying to warn her, or Lestat was trying to bait her and keep her off balance, as he had done with me.

Date: 7/17/99
From: Me
To: Jennifer

Hi Jennifer,

No I have not forwarded your name to anyone. Perhaps another one of Lestat’s girlfriends (past or present) have discovered your relationship with him and have tried to warn you about him. I completely understand that words on a screen mean nothing from strangers. I said the same thing last year when I got an e-mail from a woman that Lestat was seeing after he had asked me to marry him. We were engaged from last June to this June. I am no stranger, Jennifer, but someone that would like to save you the agony that I have suffered from having discovered all of Lestat’s infidelities and outrageous lies during our engagement. Anyway, there is so much to say, and I would prefer to do it over the phone. Are you open to that? If so, leave me a way to reach you or I can leave your my phone number...which ever you feel more comfortable with. Please consider a phone conversation...I wish I would have been open to it a year ago myself...I can't tell you how much it would have saved me from causing emotional devastation in my life.

If you talk to Lestat about this, he will make up some story about me...tell you I am a jealous friend...or an ex girlfriend who is trying to get back at him. I don't want to hurt him...he has hurt me enough...I just would like to let you know what I would have liked to know a year ago. If I can do that for you, I will feel this whole situation has had some good ending for me...and for you too. You deserve to know the truth...but you also deserve to discover it on your own, in your own way, and you will, eventually.

BlueLoverGirl

Date: 7/18/99
From: Jennifer
To: Me

For what it's worth, I'm not romantically involved with Lestat. I would never want to commit myself exclusively to any man who traveled to unknown destinations. That's my personal preference. It makes me curious why you would agree to marry a man who lived across the country, even after negative comments from ex-girlfriends. It's none of my business, but it doesn't seem like the smartest of moves.

If you are looking out for the best interest of other women, so be it, but vindictive ex-lovers can be scary. I want no part of any kind of witch hunt. I've only known Lestat for a short while, but I managed to figure out very early on that there is much more than he seems willing to share. I don't need further proof of that. I already know it.

Jennifer refused to call me, but we continued to e-mail a few more times. Then Lestat's threats began to surface:

Date: 7/18/99
From: Me
To: Lestat

Lestat wrote:
“Why are you writing my friends and people of that sort? You have no right to do that and are infringing on their privacy the way yours was. I would appreciate you not doing that. If you feel the need to rip me, do it with your friends not with mine. You only make yourself look childish that way.”

I wrote back:
“I am not writing your friends. I received a cryptic e-mail from a Jennifer and I have absolutely no idea who she is. I wrote her AFTER she wrote to me. She said "you have the wrong address" however I have never wrote to this woman. So if she thinks she has received mail from me in the past, which was not my doing. Clearly she is a friend of yours, because she is the only person I have sent an e-mail to that might have any relation to you. If any of your friends are receiving mail in my name, it is not from me. Forward me the e-mail if you like, I can assure you they aren't mine. I have not “ripped” you to anyone of your friends. I don't even know your friends - remember? You introduced me to none of them, let alone, gave me their e-mail addresses or phone numbers. I only met your co-workers. You and I both know that e-mails can be fabricated or forged.”

Perhaps his behavior was catching up with him and others were trying to warn his women about him. I received another e-mail from Jennifer admitting she had been involved with Lestat when originally she said she was not.

Date: 7/19/99
From: Jennifer
To: Me

Yes, we were involved, when you two were engaged I'm sure, but it took me only three weeks to
realize he was a deceptive liar. Did I completely end it with him, no. But I didn't stay in contact with him because I wanted him back but because I wanted him to admit that he was warped. Lying to me is a huge cop out He is an emotional wuss and can't own up to it. It's very difficult to have respect for that type of person. I do understand wanting to believe someone you care about, though. I don't want to talk on the phone right now about this because I don't see the point. If Lestat has lied about you, then I'm sure you're angry, but consider the source. He talks the talk, but he is not a good person. I simply don't want to get involved in any anti-Lestat support group. I'm curious to know what you know, but I don't want to re-live everything, you know?

She never did call me even though I completely opened the door. I wanted to limit the e-mail contact given Lestat’s ability to hack e-mail accounts. I am sure that she told him about our e-mails (or he was hacking both our accounts), because that is when his angry threats shot to another level. I blocked his ability to e-mail me from his AOL account, but he created a hotmail account and wrote me this:

Date: 7/19/99
From: Lestat
To: Me

What you are doing is basically harassment. You are guilty of all you have hated about getting email from people you don't know. These people you are writing don't want you writing them, calling them or anything else. As for you little convention of ladies you have going on (he must be referring to Lena, Amber and myself). Share your half thoughts and misconceptions on some things, biased opinions and the like if you wish. None of you are to talk about morals and issues etc.. not you or anyone. (is he crazy???)

Lets see, you have slept with so many people I loose count on, the other ladies have taken money from field trips of classrooms, let them get hammered in Europe, and her "helper" just slept with some guy the other night that she hardly knew. My my--judges against judges. (he is really reaching here – trying to compare his litany of deceit and lies and multiple affairs, to anything in our history that might seem questionable. I am sorry Lestat, but your behavior has a category all its own.)

Bottom line is I have not harassed you or your friends. That is all you have done to me and my friends. (remember, I have never talked to any of his friends) Do you want me to do that to you? Give your friends and professional contacts a peek at all your glory? You don't really think I would delete those pictures do you? Anyway, this is crap. I just want to be left alone and not have my friends call me and trying to understand what is going on.

So, I am holding you responsible for any of the people's actions that you have contacted. If I receive another friend calling me or some stupid action on your part that causes an action on mine, then I will start doing what you are doing. Writing people and asking them do they want to see the “wild side” of you. Now, leave me alone and tell the others to do the same.

“Pictures?” you ask? Well, uh…I know, I know, it was a bad idea, but I did at one point think I was going to marry this guy. Anyway, he had some “intimate” pictures of me. At the time it seemed like a good idea – we were living on opposite end of the country – we shared photos with each other. I had “intimate” pictures of him as well, but I was so disgusted by him at the end, that I deleted them all.

Before he knew I was in contact with his various women, he assured me he had deleted all the photos of me. He even chided me that I needed to ask him to get rid of them. Now in this e-mail, he was threatening to use them against me. Shit!

I wanted to get back at him, but I didn’t want to make things worse for myself either. I resolved that if he chose to e-mail my pictures out into cyberspace, that I would have to deal with the consequences of that, and not let fear rule my decision making. However, my friends and family were advising me to just drop the whole thing and avoid him altogether, because of his threats. Some of them were concerned he might actually come after me.

Remaining in the emotional spin of trying to find out all I could about his behavior, as well as find a way to get back at him, was just prolonging my pain and suffering. It was almost irresistible not to engage in this behavior, but it was making me sick. I wanted to know the truth, but the more I found out, the more I got sucked into the pain of it all.

I decided there was nothing I could do except stop contact with him in order to begin the healing process. I also wanted to avoid his retaliation, so I sent him a very honest e-mail about what was going on with me. It was my attempt to call a truce and to let him know everything I had learned. I honestly wished he would confess, that he would admit to all he had done, but I knew he never would. I had to deal with that needed confession in another way.

This e-mail (for the next chapter) was the last contact with him I ever had.